[lineate][/lineate]Na tha kuchh to khuda tha, When there was nothing there was God,
[lineate][/lineate]kuchch na hota to khuda hota, if there’d been nothing there’d have been God,
[lineate][/lineate]Duboya mujhko hone ne, Being has ruined me,
[lineate][/lineate]na hota main to kya hota? if I did not exist what would have been?
Months of journey
[lineate][/lineate] on bullock-cart, palki, boat
tonga, ekka and whatnot
[lineate][/lineate] Delhi, Kanpur, Lucknow,
Allahabad, Banaras, Banda,
[lineate][/lineate] Patna, Murshidabad,
finally Calcutta, then endless wait
[lineate][/lineate] to petition Lord Amherst—
‘double my paltry pension of rupees sixty two’
I returned to Shahjahanabad
[lineate][/lineate] scorned, derided
my family debt-ridden
[lineate][/lineate] my dignity robbed
my brother died in my arms
[lineate][/lineate] none of my sons survived
[lineate][/lineate] I turned into a stone wrapped in human skin
then came the worst
[lineate][/lineate] the massacre of Delhi
[lineate][/lineate] my friends were butchered
I alone survived
[lineate][/lineate] to take down their corpses hanging
[lineate][/lineate] from the trees, the lamp-posts
to usher them into their graves
[lineate][/lineate] to lament my destiny.
~ Abhay K.
Abhay K. (Abhay Kumar) is an Indian poet. Winner of the SAARC Literary Award 2013, he is the author of five collections of poems and two memoirs. His forthcoming collection of poems ‘Seduction of Delhi’ has received widespread critical acclaim.